shitalia

In the spirit of the World Cup and in the spirit of Italy’s win I decided to shit on them. Where else would you get that but here?

I was actually for them cuz I cant stand france BUT still I shall sit on them and let lose, why? Cuz I can. Just remember you heard it here first on EmptyWhiteRoom…

Ok this is for all the girlies who supported Italy because they have ‘cute guys’ and whatever, I’m here to convince you otherwise…

Tomassi

What can I say? Looks like a fuckin hobo. There’s nothing wrong with a haircut homie. You can have GOOD afros, this shits possible BUT ONLY WITH BLACK PEOPLE TOMASSI you slut. And something about his beard disturbs me…maybe cuz it looks dirty or SHITTY and with his hair he truly looks homeless.

Pessoto

His head isn’t in proportion with his body. Looks like Davey (ramsey you know what im talking about). Looks more scandanavian than anything, really. Looks like a … ljundstrom or some shit. The fact that he has a haircut suggests that he isn’t Italian BUT he very much is. He also injured himself cuz he fell out of a window…this guy beats the hobo.

Samuel

Looks Albanian. The godamned fringe is NOT FLY HOMIE, its anything but. Your blue eyes can only do so much. Looks like a damn refugee, some sort of foreigner, some orphan who played football on the streets his whole life, dropped out of the 4th grade and became a Cinderella story. THERES NOTHING CINDERELLA ABOUT YOUR LOOKS HOMIE, YOU MIGHT, JUST MIGHT, RESEMBLE THE FAT MOUSE CINDERELLA FOUND ‘CUTE’ BUT THAT’S AS FAR AS YOU GO. This is a pity cute, that doesn’t count.

Vieri

Ok. we all know this guy but LOOK AT HIM. big chin. big nose. big hair. youre so filthy. looks like a cheap hollywood attempt to portay a slav terrorist…'mmmm I wanna put some Chinese letters on my arm…and oh, an ARROW would be good too. And add some tribal while you at it, a friend told me it looks good. While you do that I will BATHE IN JELL AND SLICK MY FILTHY HAIR’ you goatfuck.

Zola

Hahahahahahaahahahahaha what an ugly bitch. Head is supersized. Chin is jay leno. Hair (off course) voluptuous. Looks like the fuckin original Hulk. i don’t have much comment on him, you decide…

Peruzzi

You fat bitch. I love this guy but hes an ugly bitch. And don’t give me the ‘hes a cuddly bear’ shit cuz that shit just means hes a FATTY. Goalie my ass. He just stands in front of the goal and POSSIBLY roll every once in a while to get the ball. Fatman.

Well there you have it, I hope I shined (shone? I don’t know my English) some light your way. Firstly, cute doesn’t work/matter in sport. Secondly, theyre all filthy (and may I add 3 feet tall). Thirdly, don’t let long hair fool you, theyre just hiding their zits and UGLY.

Ladies…short, buff-legged, slimey men with bad hair shouldn’t be turn ons.

(oh shit I just realized I described Ramsey in my last sentence…my argument is accurate)

Tags: /world cup/, italy, football, champions, random